By Amy, a former patient at Beyond Basics Physical Therapy
I just completed a prenatal yoga teacher training. During the closing circle, we passed around a foam pelvic floor and when we wanted to share the speaker took it as though it were a “talking stick”. As I held on to the foam model, I told the rest of the women in my training how this past year my pelvic floor had caused a lot of joy in bringing my daughter into this world, but also more pain than I could have imagined.
I had complications from the delivery of my daughter that left me in terrible pain for months. Granulation tissue (excess scar tissue) grew from my vaginal tear that the doctors were unable to treat because they did not detect I had an infection until four months postpartum. I felt physically broken. A complete failure as a mother, as all the procedures caused my pelvic floor muscles to go into spasm that it was often unbearable to walk or even sit to nurse my daughter. I was in constant pain but felt like I couldn’t share it with anyone because the pain was in my “privates”.
Pain is pain no matter where it is in your body, and I wish I had lived in a world where I could’ve been honest about my traumatic recovery without having to say “sorry if it’s TMI.” If that were the case, I hope I would have recovered faster. Even my doctors (which I saw at least half a dozen different ones to seek treatment) made me feel like this pain is private. When I asked one doctor if I could speak to another patient about the surgery she told me I needed, her response was “I don’t think she would be so open.” I hate to tell you but vaginas are not just sexual organs — at least mine created a human, oh and also, they’re pretty important if you like sitting and walking.
I felt completely alone seeing other moms six weeks postpartum already being told they can exercise and have sex when I wasn’t even there at six months. When I started going to Fiona at Beyond Basics Physical Therapy, I learned that pelvic pain was not at all uncommon and that helped me open up more to others about my experiences. Then something amazing happened, the more I opened up the less alone I felt as others felt more comfortable to share with me. As I heard more stories like mine of women suffering but not knowing how to seek treatment, I asked Fiona to come speak to at my yoga studio in Brooklyn.
To spread the word about the event, I swallowed my pride and posted on my Brooklyn new mom’s group – “I had a terrible recovery from childbirth that I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. It landed me in pelvic floor physical therapy. Whenever I share my recovery story the line “no one ever tells you these things” kept coming up. I asked my amazing physical therapist if she would come to Brooklyn to teach others about the pelvic floor (“these things”) and she agreed.” Within a few days the session was completely booked and I even received messages from complete strangers in the group wanting to share their story and get advice from me!
At the session I shared my story and am lucky that it does have a happy ending. I finally was properly diagnosed and treated after seeing a doctor Fiona had recommended. The day after the info session in Brooklyn, almost poetically, I graduated from physical therapy. Through the relaxation exercises and sessions, I no longer was in pain and was able to reclaim my life as a new mom.
I asked Fiona if I could blog since when I was going through my recovery these types of entries always comforted and encouraged me. I hope in sharing my story of my recovery with Beyond Basics it can help comfort someone in their own journey towards recovery.